I don't wanna hurt no more
by luckystar03
Summary: Haruhi leaves japan and all of her friends behind, not telling a soul she's leaving the country. Oneshot.KyoxHaru. EDITED due to apparent songfic ban. No longer songfic, regular oneshot now.


**A/N:** This is the second version of a previous oneshot I posted a couple days ago that used to be a songfic. In another songfic, I had been informed by a reviewer that songfics had actually been banned by FFN in 2005 (check FFN's wiki page if you don't believe me), before I signed up, and seeing as how there are still a bunch of songfics out there and continuously being written, I had no idea about this ban.

In any case, I'd like to actually adhere to the rules here, despite the fact that they haven't made a move to delete these songfics (about 40, 000 songfics on FFN if you search "songfic"). So, I have once again edited the oneshot and taken out all the lyrics.

I really love this oneshot, and it was the one I enjoyed most writing. I still believe it's good even without the lyrics, in any case the song I used is below if you want to check it out.

Song: I don't want to hurt no more by Anouk

* * *

At Narita International airport, a young brown-haired woman sat in a plane heading for America staring out the window, looking over Tokyo as she placed the earphones delicately in her ear.

The melody swept through her and engulfed her. It was a song that spoke to her, that sung of everything she was feeling at this very moment. It was forcing memories to the surface as a lone tear fell down her face. She was leaving behind everything. Everyone and everything she's ever known for a new world.

She was leaving him behind. The man she loved. She needed to get away to forget about him. And in order to do that, she needed to get away from Japan; everything surrounding her reminded her of him. The cherry blossoms blowing in the wind, the sunset on a beautiful morning, the first snow of the year, the beach, the parks, all of it reminding her of the things they did, the memories they made, the love they once shared.

When she told him of her decision, he showed no emotion, he accepted it. He let her do whatever she wanted, he always would. He would never fight for her. He would never degrade himself to that kind of display. There was only one thing in this world that he fought for and she was not it. She walked into the night, out of his life as he stood at the door watching the young girl leave him for good.

No one knew she was leaving. She never told a single sole of her departure. Her father was gone, dead long ago, now with her mother in heaven watching over her, and all of her friends were connected with him. No, she didn't want him to know. She wanted to forget everything as much as possible. She wanted to forget all of the pain that they have both caused each other. But deep down, she didn't want to cause him any more hurt than she already had, because she had loved him. Yes, she would at least admit this, she loved him and maybe she still does, maybe she'll never love anyone the same way she loved him. Will she ever find love again? Will she ever be happy again? Will she smile like she used to? **  
**

xXx

The day she had finally come to a decision, the day she told him, was the hardest day of her life. But she had finally made the decision and she wasn't going to regret it now. It took a lot of agonizing and heart-wrenching reflection to come to that point. She had to do it. There was no turning back. Their relationship had taken a turn. Once the fairy tale couple, promising to live happily ever after and love each other till the day they died had now succumb to reality.

Things had gotten in the way of their fairy tale romance. Familial obligations, lineage, money, petty things like this have torn them apart. They shouldn't have let it, but they had spent so many times fighting about these things. However, these were important to him. Money, lineage, the family company, these were all important to him. It was everything he's ever strived for. It was the only thing he ever wanted, but none of it mattered to her. Maybe this is where the differences in them were shown the most.

But his family was the biggest thing that tore them apart. For as much as he tried and as much as he reassured her that he would always love her and be with her, despite his family's protestation, she increasingly doubted him as the months passed. Something in them had broken, she had felt it. He was drifting away, away from her.

So she had to do it. For as much her sake as it was for him, she had to do it. She didn't want to be around when he made his final decision. She didn't want to witness his agonizing indecision every single day while he put on his fake smile trying to settle her nerves. She didn't want to see him chose money, his father's inheritance, all of it over her. She didn't want to be left for the sake of money.

But as much as she didn't want herself to hurt anymore, she didn't want to cause him more pain. She knew he was in pain. She knew he was struggling with his decision, and yes, it had hurt her greatly to know that he was even struggling to make a decision like this. But she's always hated seeing him in pain, seeing him troubled. So she made his decision for him. She left him, moved away, walked out of his life for good.

xXx

As the plane took off from Narita International Airport, she wiped the tears that accumulated from in her eyes. She let him go. She hoped he would be happy, that by doing this, he would get everything he has wanted, his father's company, the money, the respect, and hopefully he would find someone who could bring out in him, what she never could. She had shown him glimpses of it but she knew there was more. He was more loving then he had let on, but had never been able to show it. Maybe someday he would find someone that would allow him to throw caution to the wind and do anything for love. But as much as she hoped she was, she was not the one. So on this beautiful morning as she looks over Japan for possibly the last time, as the song comes to an end she touches her hand gently to the glass as she whispers "Sayonara … Kyouya …" wiping the last of her tears from her eyes. Never to shed another for a love lost.


End file.
